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Review: What Happened

In seventh grade, I endured my first breakup. I penned a 10-page "dossier" describing how it was the girl's fault and not mine, essentially presenting a minute-by-minute account of our short relationship. Three years later, I look back on the document with a smile. It was accusatory and delusional at best; creepy and bizarre at worst.

I heard negative things about Hillary Clinton's What Happened from the conservative pundits whose writings and monologues I frequent. However, I bought a $14.99 digital copy to give her a chance. I was thoroughly disappointed, and strangely, I was reminded of my dossier. 

Clinton speaking for the first time after conceding to Donald Trump

What Happened lacks a linear structure, with Clinton instead obliging to list her grievances along with out-of-place anecdotes about getting her hair done, eating healthy food on the campaign trail, and raising Chelsea. 

Even worse, the book shows that Clinton did not hold up to her promise during the election: that she would not contest or deny the validity of the results.

The book starts off with a somber introduction, which explains the misery that Clinton endured after her shocking defeat at the polls. After reading it, I almost felt bad for the former secretary of state. 

That feeling eroded quickly once she proceeded to outline how sexism forced her to spend hours at the makeup chair while men can just shower and put on a suit. 

Clinton then went on a full-on rant. She defended her use of a private server, blaming the media's overzealous coverage of the matter for her loss. She described how the Russian interference had been coordinated by the Trump campaign. She made the case that James Comey had squelched her chances by sending a letter, which concerned the revelation of undiscovered Clinton emails, to members of Congress. 

All the while, Clinton portrayed herself as a selfless mother who has spent her life fighting for blue-collar workers in Appalachia, victims of police brutality, and systematic sexism. She faults Joe Biden and Bernie Sanders for costing her the presidency while obliging to gloss over her "basket of deplorables" comment along with her vow to put coal companies out of business. 

In What Happened, Clinton also displayed erratic tendencies. She described how she wanted to make voodoo dolls of her political opponents and stick needles in them, presented her theory that the goal of Orwell's 1984 was to foster trust in authority, and claimed that Donald Trump's stalked her in the second presidential debate.

Some, namely Joseph Paul Watson, read What Happened and made the case that Hillary Clinton is a psychopath. I wouldn't go that far. I devoured the text, and upon finishing it, I came to realize that Clinton is simply unable to accept her loss. 

Clinton believes that she is a victim and that she is entitled the presidency, and because she didn't secure it, she feels a need to "explain away" her loss. That being said, I recommend that you not purchase What Happened. It serves just as much of a purpose as my seventh-grade dossier.

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